Preliminary Exam
by WonderfulCaricature
Summary: Fiyero takes an exam. From Galinda's Ozmo magazine.


**Another quiz!**

**Disclaimer: Still don't own a thing. **

"Fiyero!"

"Yes!"

"This is ridiculous!"

"Elphie, I think they may be a better couple than you and Fiyero are."

Elphaba tried leveling the perky blonde with a glare as Avaric and I wiped our blackboards off. She was just pissy she and Galinda were losing to me and Avaric. I grinned widely at her. She should have known Galinda would have misunderstood "Who is better at handling money?" in a way only a shopaholic could. Avaric laughed excitedly and beckoned Biq to ask the next question:

"Partner A, what is the first meal you ever ate with B?" Avaric stared at me for a second as Elphaba wrote tediously on her board. "Ready? Ladies first."

"Breakfast!" Galinda answered with a beaming smile. Elphaba grimaced for a moment before showing her board, which read 'oatmeal'.

"It counts!" She challenged Biq. "Oatmeal is a breakfast food!"

Biq glaced at us for a moment and then back at Galinda before giving into the pouting blonde. The girls clapped happily while Biq turned to us.

I smirked and sent a wink at Elphaba before answering. Avaric and I had this in the bag. "Peanuts."

"Peanuts?" Elphaba scoffed. "'Peanuts' is not a meal. It's not a meal, Boq!"

"Shut it, Artichoke. Peanuts is the meal of drunks." Avaric showed his board, the written confirmation of my vocal affirmation.

"You can't be serious." Elphaba protested as Biq gave both teams the point. We were leading the girls by two points.

"Just because you don't know what it's like to diet like a dynamo, doesn't mean snuggle monkey and I don't." Avaric bit.

"Diet of a dynamo? How about diet of a drunk."

"I resent that." I let Elphaba know, she rolled her eyes at me.

"Can't you erase the point for them?" Galinda batted her long lashes at the Munchkin.

"Put your cleavage away, Galinda. He can't take them away, he dines like that all the time." Avaric hissed, but she ignored him.

"'Peanuts' is hardly a proper meal." She added another pout, and the Munchkin caved.

"Hypocrite!" Avaric shouted as the girls celebrated.

"Two more questions!" Biq squeaked.

"I hope your entire province gets axed." Avaric snarled. Elphaba sighed heavily.

"Next question! B, if A was an animal -just an animal, Elphaba- which animal would they want to be?"

Easy. The girls, of course, got it right. Elphaba probably took this into account all the time, wondering what should could be if she wasn't herself. And Galinda talked about everything and anything and weaseled Elphaba into these conversations, too. They knew all these random things about one another. Avaric and I knew the _important _things.

"A snail?" Avaric cried at my answer. "Why would I want to be a damn snail, Tiggular?" Elphaba and Galinda were practically roaring with laughter.

"They're at it all the time!"

"How so?"

"They have like tons of offspring!" Elphaba lost it.

"Because they have big litters, you idiot!" Avaric revealed his answer. "A stallion, man! A stallion!"

"You hate horses!"

"And I like snails?"

"Well, you're tied." Biq broke through our serious conversation. Avaric kept his intense glare on me. I almost squirmed under the pressure he was putting on me. We were winners. We had to win. The girls would rub it in our face until there was nothing left but bone. "This is the last one, so you need to get it exactly right to get the credit, okay?"

"You hear that, cheaters?" I pointed an accusing finger at the girls. "Verbatim!"

"You don't even know what that means." Galinda retorted.

"Neither do you!" I threw back.

"Elphie, are you going to let him speak like that to me?"

"Shut up! Listen to the Munchkin!" Avaric waved Biq on.

"A, if B was stranded on an island, what three things would they take?"

"Wait! What happens if we both get it exactly right?" Avaric asked, holding out a hand to keep Elphaba from writing.

Elphaba and Galinda pondered it for a moment before Galinda answered, "Fiyero won't get it right. He cracks under pressure."

"Hey!" I argued. Elphaba smirked.

"If there's a tie, we'll let the boys win."

"Galinda-"

"No! She said it, greenie! She said it, Munchkin!" Avaric was out of his seat, brimming with excitement. "Shut it, Thropp, Galinda said it. It's final."

Elphaba sat back down in her chair, nearly as stiff as a board, trying to achieve nonverbal communication with the blonde. I don't know if Galinda was completely ignorant of Elphaba's gaze or if she was pointedly ignoring her roommate. Avaric was perfectly content. Then Elphaba's lips pulled into a half smile. Those made me nervous. She caught my stare and then it widened. Oh dear Oz.

"She's right."

"Yes!"

"Elphaba!"

"What?" Avaric snickered. "Does he have performance anxiety or something?"

"Start the clock, Biq!" I barked.

"Are you serious?"

"Biq!"

"It's Boq, actually." The Munchkin cackled as the others burst into laughter. One time!

"Write your answers!" I wasn't above pleading.

It took them a few moments longer to write their final answers. Elphaba was shaking so hard with suppressed laughter, and Avaric was laughing so hard he couldn't see. Ridiculous.

"I'm ready." Elphaba smiled.

"Same." Avaric agreed.

"Miss Galinda," Biq nodded. "You're first."

"Well, first of all, I'd like to make it perfectly clear, I will never be stranded on an island with only three things. It just won't happen." Avaric snapped for her to get it on with. She shot him a look with as much punch as his bite. "I would bring Elphaba for me, Fiyero for Elphaba, and Avaric for Fiyero!" Elphaba didn't move with excitement or disappointment.

"You know," Avaric paused. "You know I do prefer you to Fiyero for certain things, right? Right, Galinda?"

"You're for me, too, dearest." Galinda blew him a kiss.

"What did you put, Elphie?" Avaric slouched back in his chair, raising a brow to Elphaba.

She glanced at Galinda quickly before answering, "Wand, spellbook, and Avaric." She murmured so fast that it was almost undetectable. Avaric could have blinded blind people with the smile he produced at her answer.

"Come on, Fiyero!" He exclaimed, patting my leg excitedly.

"Elphaba," I said. "To repopulate the country."

"It's an island, Fiyero." Elphaba admonished but blushed.

"Hush!" Avaric threw his chalk at her.

"Avaric," Galinda 'awwed'. "To properly educate mine and Elphaba's children."

"Properly educate?" Elphaba scoffed.

"And to provide half the DNA of our children's playdates," I don't think anyone took a breath. "Galinda."

"Yes!" Elphaba and Galinda cried when Avaric hissed a string of profanities.

"What else would I put, Avaric?" I snapped. "A damn stallion?"

"You're right." Avaric sighed.

"Of course I was!" Galinda kissed his cheek triumphantly.

.

Elphaba shoved my arm off of her when I draped it over her waist once we were back in my room and in bed later that night.

"Elphaba-"

"Just drop it."

"Come on, Fae..."

"I don't want to hear it."

"Shouldn't you be happy?"

"No."

"It's the first test I passed."

"I'm _so _proud of you, Yero." She replied, deadpanned.

"I can't believe you're mad about losing a stupid game." I huffed, propping myself up on an arm to stare at her. Her eyes narrowed at me.

"You cheated!"

"We won fair and square."

"Right." Her eyes rolled.

"Don't be like this, Fae." I kissed her shoulder and tried nuzzling her neck. She elbowed my stomach.

"

"Go cry to Avaric."

I laughed and kissed her at her hairline before lying back down and holding her close to me. I loved her competitive streak, but I wasn't so jazzed about dealing with the aftermath of her losing. Even at Galinda's Ozmopolitan's preliminary lifetime commitment examination.

**Kind of different than the other Pop Quiz works, but it's still a quiz!**

**Please review:)**


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